Here’s where I’d take you in Dublin, if you were my friend

Whether Joyce said it or not, when I die, Dublin will most definitely be written on my heart.

I was born there.

I grew up there.

Many of the greatest moments of my life have taken place there.

If you’re visiting as a tourist, though, and you’re after more than overpriced pints and pub crawls, you really need a local to show you around.

Ireland’s capital is often used as a transit stop for greener pastures.

But like good Guinness, it’s worth taking time over.

This is a city with magic in its layers.

A place of revolutionary history, wild, sweeping coastline, and world-class music, Dublin’s charms rival its European counterparts.

We’re just a bit shy about them.

If you were my friend, this is where I’d take you on a long weekend in Dublin.

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Day 1

Mercifully, Dublin Airport has yet to adopt the extortionate drop-off charges in place at UK airports, so I’ll swing right up to the terminal door and we’ll be on our way.

Glasnevin Cemetery is a 20-minute spin on the north side of the city and a great place to learn the stories that shaped the nation.

We’ll do the walking tour (€17pp) and visit the final resting places of some of Ireland’s most iconic figures: Daniel O’Connell, Michael Collins, Maud Gonne and Brendan Behan, to name just a few.

History lesson complete, we’ll scoot next door for a stroll around the Botanic Gardens (free entry) and take pictures in the beautifully restored glasshouses.

Then it’s back through the cemetery to John Kavanagh’s The Gravediggers, purveyors of what is widely said to be the best Guinness in Dublin.

Part of the pub scene since 1833, the Diggers, as it is locally known, is resolutely no frills.

Anthony Bourdain visited and signed the guest book: ‘Heaven looks just like this.’
With me on the 0.0s, we’ll make for the coast and park up on Clontarf seafront for a bracing walk on Bull Island.

The candy-striped columns are one of Dublin’s best-loved landmarks.

Locals swim here year-round, even in subzero temperatures.

If you’re in need of warming up, we’ll grab a coffee from Happy Out or Kennedy’s, or a glass of wine at Cooper’s.

With restaurants, Dublin spoils for choice.

It’s impossible to choose a favourite, but for the purposes of your visit we’ll keep to the northside and eat at Grano, a neighbourhood Italian that’s almost perpetually booked out.

The Irish Times called it the ‘restaurant that stole Dublin’s heart’.

Sated with its signature ravioli and tiramisu, we’ll take a taxi to The Cobblestone, in this writer’s opinion the finest trad music pub in the city (if not the country).

Famous faces often pop in to play at a session.

Because money is no object on this fictional tour, we’ll rest our heads at The Shelbourne, one of Dublin’s most prestigious five-star hotels (standard rooms from €731 per night).

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Day 2

We won’t bother with breakfast.

Instead, we’ll take a DublinBike (London’s Lime equivalent) and cycle to Scéal, a new bakery in Portobello that does the best almond croissants in town.

While we’re on two wheels, we’ll detour to The Liberties, one of Dublin’s most fascinating neighbourhoods with 800 years of charm.

We’ll visit St Patrick’s Cathedral, stroll the old city walls and rummage in the antique shops on Francis Street.

If you’ve never been, we’ll go to the Guinness Storehouse.

Worth a visit, but not more than once.

I’d rather take you to Fallons, a pub that dates back to 1619 and does great pints and toasties.

In the afternoon, we’ll drop the bikes off and stop at Trinity College so you can see the Book of Kells, believed to be as old as 800AD.

For a spot of lunch, we can’t look past Caribou.

Their roast beef sandwich, with melted provolone, caramelised onions and a side of dipping gravy, is the stuff of legend.

Time permitting, we’ll tip on to Croke Park to watch Gaelic football or hurling.

Hurling is an ancient, high-intensity field sport, often referred to as the fastest game on grass.

Played with a wooden stick (a hurley) and a small ball (a sliotar), it’s been on the go for 3,000 years.

After a quick outfit change, we’ll dine at Bar Pez, a tiny tapas bar with excellent crab, an award-winning wine list and some of the friendliest staff in the city.

Then finish the day with a gig at Vicar Street or Flannery’s.

Night cap in one of three: The Long Hall, The Brazen Head or The Palace Bar, a favoured haunt of Ireland’s literary greats.

Day 3

This electric rail service runs the length of Dublin’s coastline, from Malahide or Howth in the north, to Greystones in the south, through the city centre.

Howth, with its breathtaking cliff walks and excellent seafood restaurants, is a great place to spend a day.

But given we’ve already devoted a full 24 hours to the northside, we’ll venture south to the seaside suburb of of Dún Laoghaire.

Our base will be Haddington House, a former Victorian schoolhouse that stands sentinel over Dublin Bay.

I’ll book the Adelaide Suite so we can crash out in its super-king bed and rolltop bathtub (€455 per night or €195 for a cosy double).

If the weather is fine, we’ll use the vintage green bikes to explore the area.

First, we’ll swim at the Forty Foot, where Dubliners have been swimming for hundreds of years (for free).

We’ll sweat it out at Sandycove Sauna by the Sea (€15 for half an hour), then spin down the coast to Dalkey for a ‘picky bits’ lunch from ThymeOut deli.

Next, visitor’s choice: we can rent a kayak at Colliemore Harbour or take a short ferry across to Dalkey Island.

Just 300 metres off the mainland, it’s currently uninhabited but there is evidence of human occupation dating back to the Neolithic period.

After a day on our feet, we’ll dine at Daata, a Pakistani-Indian fusion restaurant in Glasthule village, then retire to the Haddington’s cocktail bar.

I’ll order us both a Two Queens and we’ll say oíche mhaith (Irish for good night).

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